Errol Warman
Midfield

Football: Loved by women but feared by defenders Errol epitomises all the values that Darkside holds dear. His phenomenal work rate and eye for goal make him a naturally attacking player. Errol is however, able to play in any number of positions and over the course of the long and arduous Kingston and Surrey District League season his utility value makes him an invaluable member of the Darkside squad.

Hobbies: Sport, especially football, listening to and playing aggressive music.

Best chat up line: I'd like to eat your liver with some fava beans and a nice bottle of Chianti.

Best joke: An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman are running from the police. They run into an alley and hide in three sacks. The policeman comes up and kicks the first sack. The Englishman goes "miaow". The policeman kicks the next sack and the Scotsman goes "woof woof!". The policeman then kicks the last sack and the Irishman says "potatoes".